What Not to Wear at the Gym
For the Fashion Friday edition of my blog, I’m hitting the gym hard. Whether you work out at a private club, the Y, or a community center, your gym is a place where health, fitness and personal well being should rule the day. But it also can be a scary place where the lack of a published dress code can blur the line between appropriate sport’s attire and inappropriate and often objectionable wear. Since we communicate a lot non-verbally with our appearance, I’m compelled to help a growing number of people who need a gym fashion intervention. The rules are always changing along with the times, but today, here’s my list of what not to wear at the gym:
- No shades in the gym. Even if you had eye surgery, stay home until you can walk around without looking like a goober.
- Wear white shorts only if—nah, just don’t do it. No white shorts. Period. It’s safer that way.
- If it is wider than it is tall, don’t wear it (think about it for a minute. You’ll figure it out).
- No flip flops. No one wants to see your big toe getting smashed by a dropped dumb bell.
- No work boots with shorts, no Uggs with Daisy Duke cutoffs or any combination thereof.
- Wear underwear at all times. Just say no to crack.
- No large radio headsets that resemble Princess Leah’s big hair curls. It makes you look like you’re a recently released convict who’s been in prison since 1985.
- No wigs. Women or men.
- No skull caps unless you’re covered in tattoos wearing leather chaps. And if you are, no one will bother you, including me.
- No exposed nipple ring. If you’re a guy.
- No blue-tooth headset. As a matter of fact, it applies for out of the gym as well.
- No jammers without shorts over them unless you’re Brazilian wearing Speedo jammers in Brazil.
- No power lifting gloves unless you’re a power lifter.
- Always remember: Spandex is a privilege not a right
