It’s Christmas-party time and guys are always wondering what to wear to our favorite holiday celebrations. Here’s a quick guide on looking your best this Christmas.
Sweaters are back. But think twice before getting your old Christmas Sweater out. Well, do everyone a favor and go ahead and donate it to GoodWill.
Sometimes I wonder if I’m making a difference for my clients. Then there are days like yesterday.
Recently I connected with a pastor I had done some strategic work several years ago. I remember our first meeting and how much work I knew it would take for his church to become an outwardly-focused, evangelistic congregation. This was not just cosmetic changes, but a fundamental shift in the way he did ministry. It was going to be costly, in terms of losing core people who liked the circle-up-the-wagons approach to ministry they had, and costly in the terms of all the dollars that would walk out of the door along with those people.
As we reconnected and he shared what God has done in his congregation since those days, I was blown away. I was right. It was a painful transition, and they did lose a lot of people, but I’m thankful that the story doesn’t end there.
Since my work with the lead team, the church has grown by an average of a 1,000 people every year! And most of the growth is not from disgruntled members from other congregations. It has come from reaching those outside the faith.
As my friend shared his last five-year journey with me, I was moved to tears. I was humbled to have been a small part, a catalyst of sorts, who help them take a good church and turn it into a great one.
I’m so thankful for our meeting. I needed it. Sometimes we work hard and wonder if what we do is truly making a difference. I know my clients who lead not-for-profits, universities, churches and ministries wrestle with that question almost on a daily basis. Yesterday was a reminder that what I do matters.
Think about your life: your family, friends, clients. How often have you asked yourself, “Am I getting through at all?” I know I ask that about most exchanges with my teenage boys. And while there might not be immediate signs of life, I know that those seeds need to be planted, even when I think it’s going to fall on infertile soil.
Let me encourage you to continue to grow and do what you do with passion and excellence. It’s easy to give up when you cannot see immediate results.
“If you work too much you make yourself and your boss look bad.” That is certain not the American way! Recently I spoke with a friend whom works for an European-owned publishing company. It has taken him a while to acclimate to their working environment where more work hours doesn’t mean more credit from your supervisors.
My friend was gently reminded that he was working too much, and, therefore, making his boss look bad. What?! Yes. According to the company’s thinking, if you’re working past 5 p.m. or before 9 a.m., you’re not being effective and not managing your time well. If you work too much your productivity drops and your work quality suffers. According to the French, you make yourself and your supervisor look bad–effectiveness before busy work.
And, by the way, they close their offices from December 23 until January 2nd and that’s doesn’t count toward the month’s vacation you must take during the summer. Oh, yes, I almost forgot this one: in the next few weeks they’ll be closing the offices at noon on Fridays. I’m thinking about applying for a job there. The Immigrant I work for is definitely not French.
All right, I think I’ve said enough. What’s your take on the American work ethic? I’ve subscribed to being the first in and the last out because that’s the way you get ahead, right?
“Why are you being so generous with a total stranger?” asked the young entrepreneur sitting next to me on a recent flight. Once he found out I owned a similar business, his questions became very strategic and somewhat personal. After spending the best part of two hours giving him an “MBA” crash course, as the business man on the other side labeled our exchange, I gave him my information in case he had more questions. He was bewildered with my apparent generosity in sharing some of my businesses practices and lessons. The big question was still looming: why would I share business practices with a potential competitor?
My response was simple but not simplistic. In all my years, I always receive more in return than I give away. It doesn’t mean I’m ready to give valuable consulting for free or undercharge for my company’s services. But every time I have felt compelled to help someone who seemingly did not have a way to reciprocate, I have been blessed for it.
It’s counter intuitive, specially in the business world, and counter cultural, but it has somehow worked for me.
From time to time we are all faced with an opportunity to share, mentor, bless someone who needs our help. If you’re like me, you’re already over committed and the last thing you need is spend time with someone new that might not have a way to ever repay your generosity. I want to ask you to consider pouring some of your time, knowledge and even resources into that person. I believe you’ll be better off for it. I really do.
I have lived with an assumption for quite some time that I’m currently questioning. In my mind, digital natives (those who grew up with the internet, mp3 players and smart phones) as opposed to digital immigrants (those of us who had to learn to use such technology) were some of the best candidates to head an organization’s social media strategy. Maybe that’s not so.
In the past week I’ve had three different encounters with young professionals who were having a difficult time incorporating social media into their organization’s marketing strategy. And to make things even more interesting, all three of them were Facebook and Twitter users. I was perplexed by their lack of confidence in the media they seemingly knew so well.
What I quickly realized from my conversation with my young friends is that while they have been using Facebook, Twitter and even blogging as a personal and social tool, none of them had ever thought of those platforms as a business venue. Then it hit me: they lack the fundamental building blocks of sucessful business or ministry; therefore they cannot create a social media strategy.
Without a strategy, social media is just a bunch of pointless, meaningless and too often self serving blabber. Organizations and individuals who understand not only the “how” part of social media, but also the “what” have success in this space. For example, Dell just posted that they have made over 6.5 million dollars from their Twitter account alone. Trust me, they have a strategy.
So before you put the well-meaning but strategically-challenged digital native in charge of your social media campaign, make sure there’s a plan in place and a way for you to measure results. Whether you lead a business, a church or a not for profit organization, you can either see strong results from a well-executed plan, your you can join the many who say: “we tried it and it was a waste of time.”
Do you have a social media strategy? In your organization, who’s setting the your social media strategy?
In our culture, a new year still means a new opportunity for change, a new opportunity for new beginnings, new relationships, and a new search for a faith community. Unfortunately, most churches miss out on the first-of-the-year window because they are not prepared for the new people who will show up in the first few weeks of the year. Typically, churches put on their big Christmas musical by the second week in December and they shut down all but life support systems until after the holidays. So as new guests begin to arrive, they are met with less-than-well-put-together services, often scaled-down music programs and, most unfortunately, a three-week stewardship series.
Every church needs to teach stewardship, but we must be sensitive to the growth patterns in our culture. The first of the year is one of the top windows to reach to those outside the faith.
Think Ahead
Let me challenge you to think of Christmas and the New Year as a bundle. Churches conducting special Christmas Eve services have seen how successful these services can be in attracting large crowds. These services, much like the Easter swell, do not often translate to sustainable growth. I always advise my clients to use the Christmas Eve services as a way to communicate their first-of-the year new series. As people come in during the holidays, they receive mini invites (business card-sized brochures of the new series) or a printed brochure featuring the new series for the New Year. More aggressive churches will have large outdoor banners and even a video promotion for the upcoming series, shown before or during the services. When done well, this effort creates expectation and anticipation and gives newcomers a reason to return to the church a few weeks later.
Think Like the Unchurched
Experience has taught me that a teaching series focusing on life issues works is a great way to start the new year. Take inventory of your community and the issues people are facing and address them in a positive way. Don’t make people “work” to see how your messages will help them. Instead of preaching on “The Fruit of the Spirit,” as I saw recently on a church’s sign, talk about “The Life You Were Meant to Live.” While these two different titles reflect the same passage of Scriptures, the second speaks directly to the benefit.
Think Strategically
Don’t let your staff off the hook for the first full weekend of the year. Make sure you are planning in advance to have a great service and to cover all your bases. I’ve heard so many excuses for why things weren’t done well. “Everyone was on vacation,” “The music director just got back last night,” or “Everyone was burned out after the Christmas programs.” The bottom line is that the new people coming to your church do not care whose fault it is — all they know is their experience on that particular day was not a good one.
The reason you continue to visit a restaurant is because you expect every meal will be as good as what you remember. If your first experience is not a good one, you may think twice about going back and if they continue to falter, you will definitely not return.
Just like that restaurant, be enticing in your offerings, diligent in your preparation and excellent in your execution. Be aware of your staff’s calendar and make sure they are well-prepared. Look at the first of the year as an opportunity to reach out to the new people in your community and keep them coming back.
Money can buy happiness. It’s not a typo. Unlike popular belief, money does buy happiness. Studies have proven it. And that’s a great vindication for power shoppers just in time for black Friday (for those who read my blog from other countries, black Friday is the busiest shopping day in America.). After all people are already sleeping in tents outside Best Buy stores so they can get their new flat screen TV for a bargain. While some of us chase the deal, others chase the emotional high they get out of a purchase, we all ultimately seek the happiness that owning stuff brings. Hold on. Not so fast That’s not how money buy happiness, however.
According to author Robert Frank, in his book Luxury Fever, the positive feelings we get from material objects are frustratingly fleeting. Spending money on experiences, especially ones with other people, produces positive emotions that are both meaningful and more lasting. For instance, when researches interviewed more than 150 people about their recent purchases, they found that money spent on activities such as concerts and group dinners out, brought far more pleasure than material purchases like shoes, TVs or expensive watches.
In another study, 46 students were given $20 to spend. The ones who were told to spend the money on others were happier at the end of the day than the ones who had been instructed to spend the money on themselves.
The activity of spending money on others is called “prosocial spending.” As we enter the Christmas season, we often contemplate what we are going to ask for Christmas or, in my case, what new fun, expensive toy I’m going to “reward” myself for being, well, me.
What if instead of treating ourselves with stuff we can’t really afford to impress people we don’t really like, we decided to create meaningful experiences for those we love? How different would our Christmas be if we chose to bless those whom cannot pay us back in any way? Your act of prosocial spending might be financially helping a friend who’s going through a tough time, or perhaps it’s spending time and resources on someone you don’t know well because, if you don’t, no one else will.
Search your heart. I’m sure you’ll come up with a list of people you are uniquely positioned and gifted to help. I’m challenging you as I’m challenging myself. I hope we don’t ignore the prompting to make a difference and spend more on ourselves.
Starting a new chapter in life is one of the most exciting things to me; it presents new professional possibilities, new friendships and a way to a fresh start. Too often some of our past broken relationships and mistakes have a way of following us around like the proverbial dead albatross on our necks. A new beginning allows us to take the lessons we’ve learned with us and leave the dead albatross behind. While most of us are not likely to relocate and start a new life anytime soon, we’ll probably meet and engage someone today for the first time. That can be just the new beginning you and I need.
The longer I live the more I’m convinced that the most important assets I have are relationships. As I look in my life, the most rewarding days have been the ones shared with those whom I love. We don’t have to relocate in order to start a new chapter in my life. But I have to be aware that God gives us a new beginnings every time we meet someone new. During that first exchange I can choose to leave the dead albatrosses of failed relationships, marred friendships behind, and bring with me the lessons I’ve learned and start a new chapter together.
Today as you and I come face-to-face with a new beginning opportunity, we have a couple of choices to make. We can decide not to engage because we have been burned in the past by people, or that we have enough friends and choose to put our guard up or we can embrace the adventure that a new relationship offers and open our hearts. Even with the risk of failure, I hope we choose to jump in and allow God to use the best in us for something beautiful.
According to the statistics from the Department of Labor and Commerce my business was not supposed to last this long. This month, The A Group turns 10 years old. Only 29 out of 100 new businesses that started 10 years ago are still in business today. Not only we are still open for business, we are having our best year yet both in revenues as well as in the quality of work we produce. While there’s no miracle formula, there are a few things we got right from the beginning that allowed us to still be here today.
While I credit God with all that’s good in my life, including my business, I also know that God often gets blamed for poor decisions and misguided business practices of businesses that fail. There are a lot of factors that dictate the success or failure of any given business, some of them completely out of our control. However, there are a few critical things we got right over the past 10 years.
Passion for the work. For me and my entire team, money is often a distant secondary motivation. Yes, we want to do well, but we all love what we do and want it to be the best product it can be. Our entire team, account managers, programmers, and creatives, cares about what we do and want to see our clients succeed. We believe what we do truly matters.
No short cuts. The only thing we have at the end of the day is our integrity. Being trustworthy, delivering what we promise and doing business with integrity is not easy but it’s always the only way to go. If you cut too many corners, your entire organization will crumble. It’s just a matter of time.
The team matters. Nothing has had a greater impact on my business than those whom I hired. Poor hires have cost a lot of money and equity with our clients. Great hires have returned way beyond the resources invested in them. Best hiring advice I’ve ever had: hire slow, fire fast.
Adapt. Adapt. Adapt. In my professional world, communication and technology, the operative word is change. The pace of change has accelerated exponentially in the past decade we’ve been in business. Asking “what do we have to do to continue to serve our clients?” is a much better question than “what do we have to do to sell more of our product.”
Cash is king. If you learn to manage your cash flow, especially during the fat days, you’ll have a better chance to make it through the lean times. The problem with too much debt is that it forces you to focus on making money and not on delivering the best product or finding your best clients. Excessive debt squeezes the fun, creativity and growth out of an otherwise good business. Sometimes the allure of debt-for-fast growth can kill a good thing.
Whether you’re a CEO looking at your wardrobe choices, a hipster wannabe pastor in search of cool threads, or a professional considering a look update, choosing what to wear can be daunting and, yes, even dangerous. I often get the question “what type of clothing should I buy, or what should I avoid?” But while my teenage son might disagree with my fashion-forward mindset, I have learned some universal dos and don’ts when it comes to men’s fashion. Here’s my best attempt at helping guys avoid looking like dorks.
If you keep the following rules, you should be OK. Break them, and you’re on your own.
The Do-I-look-Stupid? Rule. If you have to ask it, don’t buy it and by all means don’t wear it. Don’t ever decide to wear something because you think that it will make you more relevant or “hip.” That usually backfires. I have seen guys wearing white belts that should never call attention to their stomachs. Last year I was carrying extra weight and should have left the white belt in the closet.
The Vintage Rule. You need at least 25 years of storage before any of your clothing becomes vintage. Most of the time it’s not vintage, it’s just badly dated. And it’s only vintage when a young person wears it, anyway. If you don’t remember when you bought it, chances are you should donate it to Goodwill. The only person I know that can still wear his Member’s Only jacket from 1985 and look good in it is my pastor, Pete Wilson.
The Flag Rule. Horizontal stripes should only be worn by flags and really skinny people. If people salute you, get the hint and change shirts.
The Sausage Rule. Tight clothing doesn’t make you look smaller, it makes you look, well, like a sausage. Sometimes when referring to pants that are too tight the sausage rule is also known as the Muffin Top Rule. This happens when your tight pants squeezes your larger mid drift creating the spillage syndrome called muffin top. It can be painful as well as unsightly.
Black not White Rule. Black covers a multitude of sins. The older I get the more I love wearing black. There’s no better friend to those of us battling middle age than a black shirt to combat all kinds of wrong, including the aforementioned muffin top. A black shirt or blazer is also a great help for those with moobs, aka man boobs. And for the love, men, don’t wear a white t-shirts unless your body fat is in the single digits.
I could go on, but I want to hear from you. What other fashion rules should men not break?