I never saw it coming. The voice on the other end of the phone said in a frail but determined way: “If God gives me four more weeks of life I will finish this book. I’ve been working on it every day.” My eyes swelled up with tears immediately. The man speaking those words, Billy Hornsby, has been battling an aggressive form of cancer that has now moved into his brain. He’s a good friend, a great leader and one the authors I represent. But he didn’t stop there. He paused and then spoke again, “God has been so good to me and I want to help people to discover the amazing life He can give them. I just need a little more time.” overwhelmed by Billy’s response I had to pull over and try to get myself back together. Just hours before I had a completely different conversation with…

Yesterday afternoon I was running errands and felt led to call a friend I hadn’t connected with in a few weeks and gave him a call. My message was short: “hey, I’m thinking of you. I hope you’re well.” Not long afterward I get a text message saying he was dealing with a family crisis, which he assumed I had heard about. I had not. I was just following the prompting to reach out to a friend and and say hi.”It must have been the Lord” he texted me later about my overture. My mind went immediate to the times that I had the same prompting but did nothing. I’m probably not alone in this. Throughout the day, we think about people whom we haven’t seen or heard in a while, or even those who are closest to us, and, most of the time, we just keep moving to our…

A life well lived happens in the context of relationships. I’m convinced of that. God designed humans to be in community with one another. That’s why food tastes better when shared with friends and a beautiful sunset experienced with a loved one stays with you forever. But successful marriages, partnerships, or friendships need attention and even what I call “relational promises.” These set of values or promises help me frame my commitment to family and friends in a way that holds me accountable to my end of the relationship. One of the most important promises I make my friends is to always give them the benefit of the doubt. A true friend will defend, uphold and protect publicly, but question privately. We all have been there–during a conversation a salient tidbit of gossip comes up about a friend who’s not present. Sometimes it’s an accusation by someone who’s been hurt.…

Yesterday I attended the memorial service for Bert Tippett.  I met Mr. Tippett during my first week of college. He was a teacher, a dear friend, a mentor, and role model to me of what meant to be a kind, genuine, graceful man who loved God, his family and those around him. A few years ago I had the privilege of working  alongside him in a few projects. He was one of the few people, perhaps the only one I have ever known, who was loved and respected by every person he met. His life was a true testament of God’s grace. He lived well and during the last few years, fought cancer valiantly. But Bert didn’t die alone and unappreciated. Interestingly, Facebook had a lot todo with that. Mr. Tippett’s 1,904 friends on Facebook kept a steady stream of encouraging messages posted on his wall day and night since…

I remembering seeing an episode of the Celebrity Apprentice where Sharon Ousborne was thrilled she was able to secure a 15 thousand dollar gift from a wealthy donor. She was ‘shocked’ because according to her, she had never seen anyone give that much money away before. Well, I was shocked but for a different reason. First, her reaction told me a lot about Mrs. Ousborne generosity quotient or lack thereof and then it reminded me how many truly giving people I have met over the years. People who have given a lot more with a lot less money. So during this giving season, what does it mean to be generous? Here’s a few thoughts about generosity: It’s not an amount. a 15 thousand dollar gift might not be as generous as a 15 dollar one.  Remember the story of the widow’s mite? It’s not about money. Sometimes your most generous…

There’s nothing more refreshing than a gracious person. I have spent the past two days playing golf with pastors of very large churches at Bay Hill in Orlando, Fl. And for those of us who have to work hard and can’t play golf regularly (I’m just bitter because of the sad state of my golf game), a gracious partner during a round is truly a gift. During this trip, I have been fortunate to play with gracious men. They were kind, encouraging, and allowed me to bend the rules of golf, which if you’re not aware, are many. (I’m convinced that golf rules were written by the Pharisees.) But as I enjoyed being the recipient of such grace, I have reflected over my own past. I’m not sure I have always been a gracious person. As as matter of fact, I’m not sure I am one today. The question today…

You probably have all the friends you “need” in life. Perhaps if you have even more of your share of close relationships and you cannot even manage the ones you have well. So, if you’re like most, you go on about your life with relational blinders on. No, you’re not rude or aloof, but you unconsciously developed the attitude that communicates, “while you might be a nice person, I’ve gotten all the friends I need.”  I wish you would reconsider. When you allow your story to intersect someone else’s story in a meaningful way something special happens. I believe God brings a new friendship into our lives sometimes for a short season, sometimes for a lifetime to enrich both lives. When we fail to seize the opportunity to engage someone new, to ask a second question that will lead into a longer, more meaningful conversation, and we retreat into our…

I didn’t grow up with thanksgiving day as a holiday. Christmas season in Brazil officially begins sometime in early November and goes on until January 6, Kings’ Day. Yes, that’s traditionally the day the Catholic church celebrates the Magi arriving in Bethlehem. But growing up,  Thanksgiving day celebration was relegated to a couple of children’s choirs singing at a local mall and a blip on the news. Brazilians are missing out, and as I stopped to take inventory of all my blessings today, something stood out on my list. This morning I joined several friends early and ran the Boulevard Bolt, a 5-mile race through Belle Meade Boulevard, my familiar running route. I rushed home and cooked a 22 lb turkey, 12 lbs of mash potato and lots of other goodies to celebrate with family and friends from far and near. As I prayed before the bounteous, tryptophan-laden and coma-inducing…

In the past few months I have been working out at the Y with a couple of guys I’ve met in the weight room. They are not only younger than me, they’re also in better shape, and while some might find working out with people who can lift twice as much weight  as you a bit intimidating, I decided that I needed the challenge.  The right workout partner can help you push through psychological and physical barriers. So after months of hitting the gym hard with my bald friends, Chris and Christian, here’s a few things I’ve learned: 1. The early hard workouts sucked. No need for euphemisms here. They were hard and painful. At one point, I asked for my mommy. 2. I needed a change. I have been working out at gyms for decades. My routine had become, routine, very routine. I was not seeing much improvement because…

You go the extra mile. You reach out and give beyond what  you thought you should give, and yet, there’s nothing in return, or at least not the return you expected. Have you been there with a friend, a family member, a spouse? We all have, and some of us seem to live in a place where we resent people’s lack of gratitude more than we appreciate our relationship with them. It’s difficult to be completely altruistic. It’s not in our human nature. Deep within we are always having the inner conversation that says, “what am I getting out of this?” We do it with God all the time in our bargaining prayers: “God if you let me have such and such, I promise I’ll do  ____” And so we do it with people we love; people we wish would love us back with the same intensity, appreciation and commitment. …